Floppy boy.

I suppose anyone who would look at Rowan would be able to tell he is different.

Tonight, though, as we were talking to each other, I remembered, I guess, that he's still a little baby to me. He does sweet baby things, like suck on his fingers and coo and wave his arms without a ton of control. He's just Rowan to us.

But boy, is he getting bigger... Rowan is three and a half at this point. He's long and is getting so heavy to hold. He likes to be held like you'd hold a baby; either cradling or up on your shoulder, and my back is feeling it. I wonder what the future holds when it comes to carrying him and moving him around.

We recently decided to switch his diet from Ketogenic to normal- and I don't think it is going well. Truthfully, the Ketogenic diet is a pain in the butt. It requires really expensive formula and specialized meals that need to be produced to a T. X carbs, x proteins, and x fats. It is a ton of work. I know I was kind of hoping the diet wasn't doing much for him and that he could just eat regular foods; ground up, of course, like the rest of us. But alas- I think we need to go back.  He is much floppier- I can tell his seizure activity has increased. His tummy hurts from some new foods- and I just don't think he is happy.

The floppiness, though... That's the dead giveaway.

He is off to Gillette Children's Hospital in a couple of weeks for another round of appointments. I hope for some - sheesh. I don't even know what I hope for from the appointment. In some ways he just is who he is- and in other ways I wonder if he should be sitting? or swallowing better? or verbalizing more??

I'm fine with him being this way- but should I be striving for more?